Nursing would be a dream job if there were no doctors.~ Gerhard Kocher
Monday, October 4, 2010
Past Nursing Quotes of the Week
Week 1
Nursing would be a dream job if there were no doctors.~ Gerhard Kocher
Nursing would be a dream job if there were no doctors.~ Gerhard Kocher
Nursing Quote of the Week
Wow, I found the following quote to be true in so many ways. One of my new favorites. I now want to know the name of the Hispanic janitor that always in the library cleaning.
During my second year of nursing school our professor gave us a quiz. I breezed through the questions until I read the last one: "What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?" Surely this was a joke. I had seen the cleaning woman several times, but how would I know her name? I handed in my paper, leaving the last question blank. Before the class ended, one student asked if the last question would count toward our grade. "Absolutely," the professor said. "In your careers, you will meet many people. All are significant. They deserve your attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say hello." I've never forgotten that lesson. I also learned her name was Dorothy. ~Joann C. Jones
During my second year of nursing school our professor gave us a quiz. I breezed through the questions until I read the last one: "What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?" Surely this was a joke. I had seen the cleaning woman several times, but how would I know her name? I handed in my paper, leaving the last question blank. Before the class ended, one student asked if the last question would count toward our grade. "Absolutely," the professor said. "In your careers, you will meet many people. All are significant. They deserve your attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say hello." I've never forgotten that lesson. I also learned her name was Dorothy. ~Joann C. Jones
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
2010 Nurses Convocation Sets the Tone for the Year
Seniors Steal the Spotlight
The Frances M. McLaughlin Division of Nursing formally opened the academic year with the convocation exercises. Attended by sophomore, junior, and senior nursing students; faculty, and alumni, the event served to set the tone for the year with words of encouragement and advice about becoming a nurse.
Jigna Patel, senior nursing student and president of the Bloomfield College Student Nurses Association spoke eloquently about empathy and the need for students to develop this very important trait in order to succeed in their chosen profession. She welcomed all students to the BCSNA and had words of encouragement for each class. To the sophomores she advised that they become close to their classmates and welcomed them as full nursing students. The junior year, she noted, is the toughest and she told them to work hard, study harder and develop real teamwork skills. To the senior class, she said “We’ve been through it all. We started out as strangers and become family.”
With that, Ms. Patel and her BCSNA board members introduced a Family Feud game with representatives from each class and a faculty member on Team A and Team B. They had to answer questions concerning nursing skills. Team B won by one point with the question “What do nursing students drink in class?”
The sophomore and junior class were all presented with a $10 gift card, courtesy of Scrubadoo.com, makers of nursing uniforms. Scrubadoo.com donated 130 cards to be distributed.
 |
| Bloomfield College is located in Bloomfield, NJ. |
Vice President Marion Terenzio related a personal tale of recently needing medical care and the compassion of the nurses who were in her attendance. She said that due to her nurses becoming part of her medical team, she was able to concentrate on her own healing with trust. She encouraged the future nurses to develop caring as well as learning to care for their patients.
Dr. Neddie Serra, chair of the division, told the students that, while the program is not “a piece of cake,” the faculty members are there to support their journeys. “We are here to help you become successful,” she related. With that, Dr. Serra introduced Brunna Coutinho ’09 and said that Ms. Coutinho is proof that there is success waiting for them. Ms. Coutinho is currently a medical/surgical nurse at the Palisades Medical Center. She was twice the recipient of the Nurses Alumni Scholarship award, which is given to a junior and a senior student with the highest GPA in nursing subjects.
Edwina “Win” Zengerle N’52, president of the Frances M. McLaughlin Alumni Association read from the Jewish scriptures and the Christian scriptures. To everything there is a season was the reading from Ecclesiastes and Faith, hope, and love was the reading from I Corinthians. These two readings are traditional for the convocation ceremony.
 |
| Jigna Patel, senior,speaks with the Nursing community. |
With that, Ms. Patel and her BCSNA board members introduced a Family Feud game with representatives from each class and a faculty member on Team A and Team B. They had to answer questions concerning nursing skills. Team B won by one point with the question “What do nursing students drink in class?”
 |
| Stephenia Manalo,junior, and Myko Lallgas,senior at Bloomfield Collge |
Mrs. Zengerle then presented the Alumni Scholarships to junior Richard Moody and senior Ashley Leandre. Both Moody and Leandre held the highest GPA in nursing subjects.
The morning was completed with a discussion and presentation by Nathan Walts from the Assessment Technologies Institute, who showed the students how to use the website that prepares them for the NCLEX exams (state tests required for nurses to practice after graduation).
Then it was back to class.
This article can be found at www.bloomfield.edu
Nursing Quote of the Week....
Nursing would be a dream job if there were no doctors. ~Gerhard Kocher
How to Become a Cardiac Nurse?
Cardiac Nurses work with patients suffering from heart-related ailments, such as heart disease, congestive heart failure or angina. Cardiac Nurses must complete a Nursing program and pass a national licensing exam.
Step 1: Research Cardiac Nursing Careers and Education Requirements
Cardiac Nurses aid patients suffering from heart disease and assist in the rehabilitation of patients who have undergone heart surgery. They may assist with surgeries, procedures or other interventions, and they provide education on management and prevention of heart disease or related conditions. Cardiac Nurses are registered nurses who have completed a Nursing program, the national licensing exam and additional training in cardiac care.Step 2: Apply to a Nursing Program
Students who wish to pursue a Cardiac Nursing career can choose to earn an associate's degree, a bachelor's degree or a diploma through a hospital program. Diploma programs are becoming less common and students are increasingly advised to pursue a Bachelor of Science in Nursing degree. Upon completion of a nursing program, students take the National Council Licensure Examination for Registered Nurses to become licensed registered nurses, RNs.
Step 3: Gain Additional Training In Cardiac Nursing
Since cardiac nursing is a specialty area, Cardiac Nurses generally require additional training. Most employers require Cardiac Nurses to have Basic Life Support and Advanced Cardiac Life Support certification. To become certified as Cardiac Nurses, RNs also need a specified amount of clinical practice and continuing education hours. Various universities and organizations may provide training opportunities, including the American College of Cardiovascular Nurses, www.accn.net.Step 4: Obtain Certification as a Cardiac Nurse
The American Nurse Credentialing Center (ANCC), www.nursecredentialing.org, provides certification in cardiac rehabilitation nursing and cardiac vascular nursing. Certification requirements include holding an active RN license, two years of experience as an RN and a minimum number of clinical and continuing education hours. According to the ANCC, certification could lead to career advancement and higher pay. The American Board of Cardiovascular Medicine, www.cvncertify.org, is another certifying agency for Cardiac Nurses.Step 5: Consider Career Advancement
Many Cardiac Nurses continue their education and become clinical nurse specialists in the area of cardiac nursing. Clinical nurse specialists are an advanced practice specialty, which usually requires a Master of Science in Nursing degree. The U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics, www.bls.gov, predicts that advance practice nurses will be in increasing demand over the next decade.
Thursday, September 23, 2010
Funny Nursing Jokes
This is just a couple of Nursing jokes and pics that I came across that I thought were pretty funny. Enjoy!
Top ten reasons to become a nurse:
Pays better then fast food, though the hours aren't as good.
Fashionable shoes and sexy white uniforms.
Needles: "Tis better to give then receive"
Reassure your patients that all bleeding stops...eventually.
Expose yourself to rare, exciting and new diseases.
Interesting aromas.
Courteous and infallible doctors who always leave clear orders in perfectly legible handwriting.
Do enough charting to navigate around the world.
Celebrate all the holidays with your friends- at work.
Take comfort that most of your patients survive no matter what you do to them.
You know you're a nurse if...
You believe every patient needs TLC: Thorazine, Lorazepam and Compazine.
You would like to meet the inventor of the call light in a dark alley one night.
You believe not all patients are annoying ... some are unconscious.
Your sense of humor seems to get more "warped" each year.
You know the phone numbers of every late night food delivery place in town by heart.
You can only tell time with a 24 hour clock.
Almost everything can seem humorous ... eventually.
When asked, "What color is the patient's diarrhea?", you show them your shoes.
Every time you walk, you make a rattling noise because of all the scissors and clamps in your pockets.
You can tell the pharmacist more about the medicines he is dispensing than he can.
You carry "spare" meds in your pocket rather than wait for pharmacy to deliver.
You refuse to watch ER because it's too much like the real thing and triggers "flash backs."
You check the caller ID when the phone rings on your day off to see if someone from the hospital is trying to call to ask you to work.
You've been telling stories in a restaurant and had someone at another table throw up.
You notice that you use more four letter words now than before you became a nurse.
Every time someone asks you for a pen, you can find at least three of them on you.
You can intubate your friends at parties.
You don't get excited about blood loss ... unless it's your own.
You live by the motto, "To be right is only half the battle, to convince the physician is more difficult."
You've basted your Thanksgiving turkey with a Toomey syringe.
You've told a confused patient your name was that of your coworker and to HOLLER if they need help.
Eating microwave popcorn out a clean bedpan is perfectly natural.
Your bladder can expand to the same size as a Winnebago's water tank.
When checking the level of orientation of a patient, you aren't sure of the answer.
You find yourself checking out other customer's arm veins in grocery waiting lines.
You can sleep soundly at the hospital cafeteria table during dinner break, sitting up and not be embarrassed when you wake up.
You avoid unhealthy looking shoppers in the mall for fear that they'll drop near you and you'll have to do CPR on your day off.
You've sworn you're going to have "NO CODE" tattooed on your chest.
3 Nurses and a Wish
A nursing assistant, floor nurse, and charge nurse from a small nursing home were taking a lunch break in the break room. In walks a lady dressed in silk scarfs and wearing large polished stoned jewlery.
"I am 'Gina the Great'," stated the lady. "I am so pleased with the way you have taken care of my aunt that I will now grant the next three wishes!" With a wave of her hand and a puff of smoke, the room was filled with flowers, fruit and bottles of drink, proving that she did have the power to grant wishes before any of the nurses could think otherwise.
The nurses quickly aurgued among themselves as to which one would ask for the first wish. Speaking up, the nursing assistant wished first. "I wish I were on a tropical island beach, with single, well-built men feeding me fruit and tending to my every need." With a puff of smoke, the nursing assistant was gone.
The floor nurse went next."I wish I were rich and retired and spending my days in my own warm cabin at a ski resort with well groomed men feeding me coccoa and doughnuts." With a puff of smoke, she too was gone.
"Now, what is the last wish?" asked the lady.
The charge nurse said," I want those two back on the floor at the end of the lunch break."
Two doctors were in a hospital hallway one day complaining about Nurse Nancy.
" She's incredibly mixed up," said one doctor. "She does everything absolutely backwards.
Just last week, I told her to give a patient 2 milligrams of morphine every 10 hours.
She gave him 10 milligrams every 2 hours. He damn near died on us!"
The second doctor said, "That's nothing.
Earlier this week, I told her to give a patient an enema every 24 hours.
She tries to give him 24 enemas in one hour! The guy damn near exploded!"
Suddenly, they hear this blood-curdling scream from down the hall.
" Oh my God!" said the first doctor, "I just realized I told Nurse Nancy to prick Mr. Smith's boil!"
A man goes to visit his 85-year-old grandpa in hospital.
" How are you grandpa? he asks.
"Feeling fine," says the old man.
"What's the food like?"
"Terrific, wonderful menus."
"And the nursing?"
"Just couldn't be better. These young nurses really take care of you."
"What about sleeping? Do you sleep OK?"
"No problem, nine hours solid every night. At 10 o'clock they bring me a cup of hot chocolate and a Viagra tablet ... and that's it. I go out like a light."
The grandson is puzzled and a little alarmed by this, so rushes off to question the Sister in charge. "What are you people doing," he says,
" I'm told you're giving an 85-year-old Viagra on a daily basis. Surely that can't be true?"
"Oh, yes," replies the Sister. "Every night at 10 o'clock we give him a cup of hot chocolate and a Viagra tablet. It works
wonderfully well. The chocolate makes him sleep, and the Viagra stops him from rolling out of bed
A new nurse listened while the doctor was yelling, "Typhoid! Tetanus! Measles!"
The new nurse asked another nurse, "Why is he doing that?"
The other nurse replied, "Oh, he just likes to call the shots around here."
Three nurses died & went to heaven where they were met at the Pearly Gates by St. Peter. To the first, he asked, "What did you do on Earth and why should you go to heaven?" "I was a nurse in an inner city hospital," she replied. "I worked to bring healing and peace to the poor suffering city children." "Very noble," said St. Peter. "You may enter." And in through the gates she went.
To the next, he asked the same question, "So what did you do on Earth?" "I was a nurse at a missionary hospital in Africa," she replied. "For many years, I worked with a skeleton crew of doctors and nurses who tried to reach out to as many peoples and tribes with a hand of healing and with a message of God's love." "How touching," said St. Peter. "You too may enter." And in she went.He then came to the last nurse, to whom he asked, "So, what did you do back on Earth?" After some hesitation, she explained, "I was just a nurse at an H.M.O." St. Peter pondered this for a moment, and then said, "Okay, you may enter also." "Whew!" said the nurse. "For a moment there, I thought you weren't going to let me in." " Oh, you can come in," said St. Peter, "but you can only stay for three days..."
What did the nurse say when she found a rectal thermometer in her pocket? " Some asshole has my pen!"
What's the difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer?
The taste.
Why did the nurse always insist on using the rectal thermometer to obtain temperatures? She was taught in nursing school to always look for her patient's best side.
How can you tell who is the head nurse of a facility?
She's the one with dirty knees.
They found a naked dead body of a nurse washed up on the shore today.
How did they know it was a nurse?
She had an empty stomach, a full bladder, and her butt was chewed out.
Top ten reasons to become a nurse: Pays better then fast food, though the hours aren't as good.
Fashionable shoes and sexy white uniforms.
Needles: "Tis better to give then receive"
Reassure your patients that all bleeding stops...eventually.
Expose yourself to rare, exciting and new diseases.
Interesting aromas.
Courteous and infallible doctors who always leave clear orders in perfectly legible handwriting.
Do enough charting to navigate around the world.
Celebrate all the holidays with your friends- at work.
Take comfort that most of your patients survive no matter what you do to them.
You know you're a nurse if...
You believe every patient needs TLC: Thorazine, Lorazepam and Compazine.
You would like to meet the inventor of the call light in a dark alley one night.
You believe not all patients are annoying ... some are unconscious.
Your sense of humor seems to get more "warped" each year.
You know the phone numbers of every late night food delivery place in town by heart.
You can only tell time with a 24 hour clock.
Almost everything can seem humorous ... eventually.
When asked, "What color is the patient's diarrhea?", you show them your shoes.
Every time you walk, you make a rattling noise because of all the scissors and clamps in your pockets.
You can tell the pharmacist more about the medicines he is dispensing than he can.
You carry "spare" meds in your pocket rather than wait for pharmacy to deliver.
You refuse to watch ER because it's too much like the real thing and triggers "flash backs."
You check the caller ID when the phone rings on your day off to see if someone from the hospital is trying to call to ask you to work.
You've been telling stories in a restaurant and had someone at another table throw up.
You notice that you use more four letter words now than before you became a nurse.
Every time someone asks you for a pen, you can find at least three of them on you.
You can intubate your friends at parties.
You don't get excited about blood loss ... unless it's your own.
You live by the motto, "To be right is only half the battle, to convince the physician is more difficult."
You've basted your Thanksgiving turkey with a Toomey syringe.
You've told a confused patient your name was that of your coworker and to HOLLER if they need help.
Eating microwave popcorn out a clean bedpan is perfectly natural.
Your bladder can expand to the same size as a Winnebago's water tank.
When checking the level of orientation of a patient, you aren't sure of the answer.
You find yourself checking out other customer's arm veins in grocery waiting lines.
You can sleep soundly at the hospital cafeteria table during dinner break, sitting up and not be embarrassed when you wake up.
You avoid unhealthy looking shoppers in the mall for fear that they'll drop near you and you'll have to do CPR on your day off.
You've sworn you're going to have "NO CODE" tattooed on your chest.
3 Nurses and a Wish A nursing assistant, floor nurse, and charge nurse from a small nursing home were taking a lunch break in the break room. In walks a lady dressed in silk scarfs and wearing large polished stoned jewlery.
"I am 'Gina the Great'," stated the lady. "I am so pleased with the way you have taken care of my aunt that I will now grant the next three wishes!" With a wave of her hand and a puff of smoke, the room was filled with flowers, fruit and bottles of drink, proving that she did have the power to grant wishes before any of the nurses could think otherwise.
The nurses quickly aurgued among themselves as to which one would ask for the first wish. Speaking up, the nursing assistant wished first. "I wish I were on a tropical island beach, with single, well-built men feeding me fruit and tending to my every need." With a puff of smoke, the nursing assistant was gone.
The floor nurse went next."I wish I were rich and retired and spending my days in my own warm cabin at a ski resort with well groomed men feeding me coccoa and doughnuts." With a puff of smoke, she too was gone.
"Now, what is the last wish?" asked the lady.
The charge nurse said," I want those two back on the floor at the end of the lunch break."
Two doctors were in a hospital hallway one day complaining about Nurse Nancy.
" She's incredibly mixed up," said one doctor. "She does everything absolutely backwards.
Just last week, I told her to give a patient 2 milligrams of morphine every 10 hours.
She gave him 10 milligrams every 2 hours. He damn near died on us!"
The second doctor said, "That's nothing.
Earlier this week, I told her to give a patient an enema every 24 hours.
She tries to give him 24 enemas in one hour! The guy damn near exploded!"
Suddenly, they hear this blood-curdling scream from down the hall.
" Oh my God!" said the first doctor, "I just realized I told Nurse Nancy to prick Mr. Smith's boil!"
A man goes to visit his 85-year-old grandpa in hospital.
" How are you grandpa? he asks.
"Feeling fine," says the old man.
"What's the food like?"
"Terrific, wonderful menus."
"And the nursing?"
"Just couldn't be better. These young nurses really take care of you."
"What about sleeping? Do you sleep OK?"
"No problem, nine hours solid every night. At 10 o'clock they bring me a cup of hot chocolate and a Viagra tablet ... and that's it. I go out like a light."
The grandson is puzzled and a little alarmed by this, so rushes off to question the Sister in charge. "What are you people doing," he says,
" I'm told you're giving an 85-year-old Viagra on a daily basis. Surely that can't be true?"
"Oh, yes," replies the Sister. "Every night at 10 o'clock we give him a cup of hot chocolate and a Viagra tablet. It works
wonderfully well. The chocolate makes him sleep, and the Viagra stops him from rolling out of bed
A new nurse listened while the doctor was yelling, "Typhoid! Tetanus! Measles!"
The new nurse asked another nurse, "Why is he doing that?"
The other nurse replied, "Oh, he just likes to call the shots around here."
Three nurses died & went to heaven where they were met at the Pearly Gates by St. Peter. To the first, he asked, "What did you do on Earth and why should you go to heaven?" "I was a nurse in an inner city hospital," she replied. "I worked to bring healing and peace to the poor suffering city children." "Very noble," said St. Peter. "You may enter." And in through the gates she went.
To the next, he asked the same question, "So what did you do on Earth?" "I was a nurse at a missionary hospital in Africa," she replied. "For many years, I worked with a skeleton crew of doctors and nurses who tried to reach out to as many peoples and tribes with a hand of healing and with a message of God's love." "How touching," said St. Peter. "You too may enter." And in she went.He then came to the last nurse, to whom he asked, "So, what did you do back on Earth?" After some hesitation, she explained, "I was just a nurse at an H.M.O." St. Peter pondered this for a moment, and then said, "Okay, you may enter also." "Whew!" said the nurse. "For a moment there, I thought you weren't going to let me in." " Oh, you can come in," said St. Peter, "but you can only stay for three days..."
What did the nurse say when she found a rectal thermometer in her pocket? " Some asshole has my pen!"
What's the difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer?
The taste.
Why did the nurse always insist on using the rectal thermometer to obtain temperatures? She was taught in nursing school to always look for her patient's best side.
How can you tell who is the head nurse of a facility?
She's the one with dirty knees.
They found a naked dead body of a nurse washed up on the shore today.
How did they know it was a nurse?
She had an empty stomach, a full bladder, and her butt was chewed out.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)